Must Read Christmas Announcement

PornoDoggy · 12-05-2002

Subject: Bubba Claus

Effective immediately, I will no longer be able to serve the Southern portion of the United States on Christmas Eve. Due to earth's current overwhelming population my contract has been renegotiated.

Rest assured, southern children will be in good hands with your local replacement--Bubba Claus--who happens to be my third cousin. (Bubba's side of the family is from the South Pole.) My cousin shares my goal of delivering toys to good boys and girls; however, there are a few differences between us. Please note:

1. There is no danger of a Grinch stealing your presents from Bubba Claus. He has a gun rack on his sleigh and a bumper sticker that reads: "These toys insured by Smith and Wesson."

2. Bubba Claus prefers RC colas and moonpies to milk and cookies and he doesn't smoke a pipe. He does dip a little snuff though, so please have a Dixie Cup with a folded towel in the bottom handy.

3. Bubba Claus' sleigh is pulled by floppy-eared, flyin' coon dogs instead of reindeer. I once made the mistake of loaning him a couple of my reindeer; Blitzen's head now overlooks Bubba's fireplace.

4. You won't hear "On Comet, on Cupid, on Donner and Blitzen" from Bubba Claus. Instead you'll hear, "On Earnhardt, on Andretti, on Elliott and Petty."

5. "Ho, ho, ho!" has been replaced by "Yee Haw!"

6. And finally, Bubba Claus doesn't wear a belt. If I were you, I'd make sure your wife and kids turn the other way when he bends over to put presents under the tree.

Sincerely yours,
Santa Claus
Member of North American Fairies and Elves/Union 1225

wig · 12-06-2002

Ah hahaha Very funny! Good one, PD.

But, I'm sure Bubba wears overalls. ;-)

Mike AI · 12-06-2002

good one!!

Mutt · 12-06-2002

i think PD is calling MikeAI a redneck or somethin?

oh my

Torone · 12-06-2002

Pd,
I genuinely enjoyed that!

PornoDoggy · 12-06-2002

Quote:

Originally posted by Mutt@Dec 6 2002, 08:13 PM
i think PD is calling MikeAI a redneck or somethin?

oh my

Put yer shit-stirrin' spoon away, Mr. Mutt sir ... I do believe Mr. MikeAI lives in N'alens ... last time I checked it was slightly south, and thus would fall under the turf of Cuzin Bubba Claus.

12-05-2002	#1
PornoDoggy Cramming 3 people in a Room to Attend Show Want to see your own Advertising Here! Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Amid the Cornfields of Illinois Posts: 5,366	Subject: Bubba Claus Effective immediately, I will no longer be able to serve the Southern portion of the United States on Christmas Eve. Due to earth's current overwhelming population my contract has been renegotiated. Rest assured, southern children will be in good hands with your local replacement--Bubba Claus--who happens to be my third cousin. (Bubba's side of the family is from the South Pole.) My cousin shares my goal of delivering toys to good boys and girls; however, there are a few differences between us. Please note: 1. There is no danger of a Grinch stealing your presents from Bubba Claus. He has a gun rack on his sleigh and a bumper sticker that reads: "These toys insured by Smith and Wesson." 2. Bubba Claus prefers RC colas and moonpies to milk and cookies and he doesn't smoke a pipe. He does dip a little snuff though, so please have a Dixie Cup with a folded towel in the bottom handy. 3. Bubba Claus' sleigh is pulled by floppy-eared, flyin' coon dogs instead of reindeer. I once made the mistake of loaning him a couple of my reindeer; Blitzen's head now overlooks Bubba's fireplace. 4. You won't hear "On Comet, on Cupid, on Donner and Blitzen" from Bubba Claus. Instead you'll hear, "On Earnhardt, on Andretti, on Elliott and Petty." 5. "Ho, ho, ho!" has been replaced by "Yee Haw!" 6. And finally, Bubba Claus doesn't wear a belt. If I were you, I'd make sure your wife and kids turn the other way when he bends over to put presents under the tree. Sincerely yours, Santa Claus Member of North American Fairies and Elves/Union 1225 __________________ SEX STORY TEXT Exotic Material for Adult Websites Available for part time (project or ongoing) work ...

12-06-2002	#3
Mike AI Administrator Want to see your own Advertising Here! Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 11,618	good one!! __________________ Make big money on your Domains! Why wait 40 days to get paid with the other guys? Parked.com pays the most for your traffic, and cuts checks twice a month!

12-06-2002	#5
Torone Members Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Houston, TX Posts: 1,137	Pd, I genuinely enjoyed that! __________________ Why me? Why always me?

12-06-2002	#2
wig Members Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 1,248	Ah hahaha Very funny! Good one, PD. But, I'm sure Bubba wears overalls. ;-)

12-06-2002	#4
Mutt Members Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 1,087	i think PD is calling MikeAI a redneck or somethin? oh my