I'm much more about the eating than the cooking. Furthermore, when I do cook, it tends to be by the seat of the pants and thus no real specific recipe. I make wonderful chili, but I doubt I've ever had the same mix of ingredients twice.

So not a lot I can contribute in terms of recipes. Though I am available for tasting sessions.

I do have one I dont stray from though. And this is your basic southern style skillet cornbread. True southern cornbread is NOT sweet and is baked on high heat in a well aged cast iron skillet. Mine is over 100 years old and passed down thru several generations already.

Recipe is very basic...

2 cups corn meal
1 egg
4 heaping table spoons of cheap nasty mayonnaise style salad dressing/spread (trust me on this one)
1 1/2 cups water

Mix well.

Grease cast iron skillet, dont get fancy, use crisco or similar. Preheat oven to 400. Put it all in the skillet and bake until it's nice and brown.

Now normally this will be served by crumbling it up in a plate and covering it with beans which you've also cooked (pintos, northern, butterbeans, or even blackeyed peas) and then dowsed with a little pepper sauce if you wanna liven it up a bit.

However, a true southerner is perfectly happy to crumble their cornbread into a glass or bowl and cover it with milk and eat it like cereal. The more hardcore will even cover it in buttermilk.

Notice he didnt say "ADD SUGAR"

Notice he didnt say "ADD SUGAR" [/b][/quote]
Beans dont taste good on pound cake.

If I may add a little to this. It's much the way we do it. But we stir in chopped green & red peppers and some black beans before baking. Damn tasty. :)

I'll have to try the Mayo!

Mine's the same ingredients but instead of mayo I put in buttermilk and sometimes it's dry. :(

Syrup and butter are good on it too - that used to be our dessert many nights :)

And to reiterate to you northerners

THERE'S NO SUGAR IN CORNBREAD!!!!!!

Nor is there sugar in hush puppies. :)

Nor is there sugar in hush puppies. :) [/b][/quote]
Those get Jalepenos.

Nor is there sugar in hush puppies. :) [/b][/quote]
Correct - they get onions though :)

Notice he didnt say "ADD SUGAR" [/b][/quote]
I learned this real quick when I married a guy with strong Southern ties... his grandma used to give him cornbread and milk to fill up his tummy before bedtime as a boy - he got our kids eating the stuff too. Not the healthiest thing in the world I wouldn't think but a hell of a lot better than the stuff I grew up on. lol

Now that I've had it I can really tell the difference between true Southern cornbread and that too-sweet sugary crap they usually try to pass off in restaurants. :blink:

Another thing I learned about was iced tea - you make it WITH sugar. LOTS of it. I tried some of his aunt's tea once, added my own teaspoon of sugar and they looked at me like I was crazy. I shrugged it off, took a sip and WOWZA - that was some sweet tea!

:lol:

Sweet Iced Tea is the table wine of the south. It is served very sweet and over ice.

Anyone who tells you that you should just "sweeten" cold tea by pouring a pack of sugar in it at the table is a yankee.

It is also served with any and every meal including breakfast. Though in a pinch, a cold coca-cola is also suitable for breakfast.

This is why southerners hate to travel outside the south. Yankees dont sweeten their tea when they brew it and think a pepsi is a suitable substitute for a coca-cola.

I did the opposite and almost did it again - marrying a yankee!

Even though the husband indtroduced me to steamed blue crabs and Old Bay (for which I will ALWAYS be grateful), the one from NJ did nothing culinary for me. And when he put sugar on the grits I made for him....well, he just had to go :P

I did the opposite and almost did it again - marrying a yankee!

Even though the husband indtroduced me to steamed blue crabs and Old Bay (for which I will ALWAYS be grateful), the one from NJ did nothing culinary for me. And when he put sugar on the grits I made for him....well, he just had to go :P [/b][/quote]
See I sort of get the best of both worlds lol. Here in Virginia, we have the imaginary "Yankee - Redneck" line somewhere around Richmond. I grew up on both real cornbread and bluecrabs with oldbay. I guess our diverse cuisine makes up for Virginia being home to both Jerry Fallwell and Pat Robertson. :lol:

One can sharp cheddar squirt cheese
One 6 inch piece of black electrical tape

Sit in chair and wrap tape around nozzle
Stick can in mouth
Tighten tape to bend nozzle and start cheese flow
Tilt head back and swallow as needed

:)

I'm sorry I do not eat lunch at the cool table. What does FFN stand for? :huh:

Fat Fucking Nobodies :)

Fat Fucking Nobodies :) [/b][/quote]
Wow how nice, there is a club in honor of myself!

ok here is a recipe for my Party Potatoes

1. 4-5 lbs of potaoes peeled, cooked and mashed
2. one container sour cream
3. 1/2 cup parasean cheese
4. one 10 package of cream cheese
5. 1/2 stick of butter
6. one onion sauted

Mix it all together salt and pepper fo taste bake for about 40-50 minutes

Wow how nice, there is a club in honor of myself! [/b][/quote]
It's a good club :) We eat well and it shows :P

Lindsey was right. They ARE delicious!

I still have a few I zealously guard. [/b][/quote]
http://www.simplyoz.com/products/aussie_food/biscuits

no longer do I have to wait on the Aussies to bring Tim Tams with them to the shows...

;-))

Here's an easy cake that will add a few pounds and have people thinking you worked all day baking it from scratch.

1 box devils food or dark chocolate cake mix (with pudding in the mix)
Jar of hot fudge
Kahlua

Make the cake according to directions EXCEPT
where it calls for 1 1/3 cup water replace the 1/3 of a cup with Kahlua
add a huge heaping tablespoon of hot fudge to the batter
mix and bake according to the package

add your favorite chocolate icing and you're a masterbaker.

http://www.simplyoz.com/products/aussie_food/biscuits

no longer do I have to wait on the Aussies to bring Tim Tams with them to the shows...

;-)) [/b][/quote]
Raven isn't joking when she says she zealously guards those Tim-Tams... she got 2 boxes in Vegas and didn't share a single one....

:headwall:

http://www.fatfuckingnobodies.com

I think we need to add some associate members to the website.

HP, that's a good idea!!

you could also start to add some stuff to it as webmaster content ....

associate members
isjustanFFN
FFN Recipes

:agrin:

my new motto .....

EVERYTHING'S CONTENT BABEEE!!! :biglaugh:

We've thought about it.

It MIGHT fit my basic criteria for what we work on this year. I've sworn not to work on anything that doesn't have a clear plan to generate either traffic or cash....

traffic... traffic... traffic..

Fat Fucking Nobodies :) [/b][/quote]
I always thought it was Fat Felonious Niggers.

guess i'm out of the loop.

also doubles as quick-dry cement.

Fries
cheese
gravy.



nothing beats it for that 3am bar-closed craving....

Damn...that sounds really good...haven't had curry in ages!

I always thought it was Fat Felonious Niggers.

guess i'm out of the loop. [/b][/quote]
You have this fascination with negros today.

Did Big Dick Black send your girlfriend home with a big smile on her face or something?

BTW, the tamarind and leftover coconut milk is meant to go in about 15mins before end of cooking!

Here's a really good Spaghetti Bolagnese one:

Ingredients:
50g butter
2 cloves garlic (crushed)
1 onion (chopped)
3 carrots (peeled and diced)
2-4 small mushrooms (sliced up)
8-16 pieces of bacon (sliced width ways into strips)

500g minced beef
4 tablespoons dry white vermouth
450ml beef stock
1 1/2 table spoons tomato puree
3 tablespoons double cream

Heat the butter and add the garlic, onion, carrots, mushrooms, and bacon. Fry for 15 mins. Add the minced beef and brown all over. Mix well and cook for 5 mins. Add the vermouth, continue cooking for 5 more mins. Mix in the beef stock and tomato puree, turn heat down, cover pot, and simmer for 1 - 1 1/2 hours. Add the cream and mix it in 10 mins before the end of cooking :okthumb:

True FFN spaghetti is one thing I do cook....

Single serving is 4-6 oz of spaghetti (couple of platefuls) mixed with at least 1 pound of beef and a jar of whatever spaghetti sauce sounds tasty at the store....

I like just a few noodles mixed with my beef...

Everything must be made with butter
I look for the extra fat version of everything
I want extra fat, extra flavor
Bacon, mmm bacon - by the pound
More butter
Whole milk

Trying to use anything low fat may end in your being exiled from the kitchen or not on the approved restaurant list

I'll most likely never have the physical size to be an FFN, have to eat like a horse just to maintain a thin frame.

Billy has a great recipe for BBQ Shrimp and here is one I just looked up
Not shrimp with bacon and BBQ sauce but something different and damn tasty (and the shrimp are served with the heads on)

3 pounds large Gulf shrimp, in their shells
2 tablespoons Creole seasoning
Cracked black pepper
2 tablespoons olive oil
1/4 cup chopped onions
2 tablespoons minced garlic
3 bay leaves
3 lemons, peeled and sectioned
2 cups water
1/2 cup Worcestershire sauce
1/4 cup dry white wine
1/4 teaspoon salt
2 cups heavy cream
2 tablespoons butter

Peel the shrimp, leaving only their tails attached. Reserve the shells and set aside. Sprinkle the shrimp with 1 tablespoon Creole seasoning and fresh cracked black pepper. Use you hands to coat the shrimp with the seasonings. Refrigerate the shrimp while you make the sauce base.
Heat 1 tablespoon of the oil in a large pot over high heat. When the oil is hot, add the onions and garlic and saute for 1 minute. Add the reserved shrimp shells, the remaining Creole seasoning, the bay leaves, lemons, water, Worcestershire, wine, salt, and black pepper. Stir well and bring to a boil. Reduce the heat and simmer for 30 minutes. Remove from the heat, allow to cool for about 15 minutes. Strain into a small saucepan. There should be about 1 1/2 cups. Place over high heat, bring to a boil, and cook until thick, syrupy, and dark brown, for about 15 minutes. Makes about 4 to 5 tablespoons of barbecue sauce base. Heat the remaining 1 tablespoon of oil in a large skillet over high heat. When the oil is hot, add the seasoned shrimp and saute them, occasionally shaking the skillet, for 2 minutes. Add the cream and all of the barbecue base. Stir and simmer for 3 minutes. Remove the shrimp to a warm platter with tongs and whisk the butter into the sauce. Remove from the heat. Mound the shrimp in the center of a platter. Spoon the sauce over the shrimp and around the plate

More ways to prepare BBQ shrimp

1 pkg Yeast
1 cup Water @ 110ºF
1 tsp Salt
3 Tbsp Honey
Approximately 3 cups Flour


Dissolve yeast in water; Then add honey, and stir until melted... let sit for 5-6 minutes
to "proof" yeast. After 5-6 minutes, it should be frothy.

While stirring, add in salt until dissolved. Slowly add flour, until the right texture
for kneading. Knead for 10 minutes. Preheat oven to 150º f.

Turn off oven; Place dough, covered, in oven to rise for 45 minutes.

Fill a large pot with water; boil and add 2 Tbsp canola or vegetable oil to the water.

Take dough out of oven and preheat the oven to 425º f. Tear off pieces of dough
and form into 7 to 8 "snakes". Pinch the ends together to form bagels.

Place the bagels in boiling water for approximately 1 minute. They will float when ready.

Place bagels on floured pizza brick (preferred method), or on slightly greased
cookie sheet. Add any additional ingredients (chopped onion, chopped garlic,
poppyseed, sesame seeds)

Bake at 425ºF for 25-30 minutes until golden brown.



Anyone that wants a cinnamon raisin bagel should be shot by firing squad... :P

Serotonin Flow Chart
The flow chart shows the mechanism involved in craving fattening foods to the end
result of increased fat cell size, as well as increased risk of cancer, diabetes, heart
disease and accelerated aging.

http://www.glycemic.com/gcm/images/S...ow_chart_3.jpg

So....I can deprive myself and not eat what I want to eat and maybe live longer and hope I don't get hit by a bus or I can eat what I want and live a happy short life :P

Don't sweat it. He's not gonna talk me into eating wheat grass and I am not gonna talk him into eating scrapple and gravy. It's the classic mexican standoff...

I figure the years I'll miss include those spent drooling and shitting on yourself.

Meanwhile, I really enjoy good food.

Acceptable trade off.

no one can else can define happiness for you!
:)

bungee cord