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| Legacy Archived Main Board Business chat and general industry chat. All participation is welcome. Dont post your fucking spam here. |

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#1 |
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Dreaming of a Cowboy Hat like Max Hardcore
Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 1,812
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I felt we should kick off the new look of Oprano with a contest. Now, since it is MY contest, it's going to involve some literary skills.
Oh, stop groaning, spelling won't count and you only need to write a paragraph or so. One paragraph, spelling doesn’t count, easy enough, right? Oh, there is one teensy weensy rule. You must use as many smilies, instead of words, as you can to express yourself. The contest will last from today through Saturday 9/24 I have begged..uh no, threatened...uh uh...bribed...uhmmm...Morgan has graciously volunteered to judge the entries with me. In the event of a tie, we will turn to the wisdom of our own Solomon and fearless leader, Nick, for a decision. There will be 4 categories judged: 1. The best story not using any smilies that will make Morgan throw up. You would think a woman who makes her living writing smut would be able to handle these...and you'd be wrong. 2. Initiation for the new mod on the block. That's right, this is for the best story that makes the most brutal fun of Dravyk. I’m sorry Dravyk. I know you don’t know me well, but I’m sure putting you through this will make us just the very best of friends. 3. The story that best seduces the judges. Yes, here is your chance to turn on the women that write the words that make the whole web schwiiing. 4. The most creative story without a category to guide you. This is for those of you who have trouble with following guidelines. Just let your creativity flow. What's that? You ask. You want prizes? Ah well, I guess it would be too much to ask that you would want to do it just for the literary challenge, so there will be prizes. From Exclusive Content - a $50 gift certificate to get some of their excellent images. From TopBucks - One week's worth of traffic from their #1 exit console. From Homegrown Cash - One month of homegrown content feeds From Written Temptations - 2 story packs. One from Morgan and one from myself. From the Oprano Newbie Webmaster Board's TGP Project - a $25 Amazon gift certificate. From Oprano - each applicant will receive a limited edition, collector’s item. An Oprano mafia tee shirt. Attention Mods: You, on the other hand, if you choose to play, will do it just for the literary challenge. I want to thank our advertisers that have generously donated these fantastic prizes. Opranauts are intelligent, witty and extremely clever. So get out there and get those creative juices flowing. I know you will make me proud. |
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#2 |
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Dreaming of a Cowboy Hat like Max Hardcore
Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 1,812
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Oops, I almost forgot. Please post all entries in this thread.
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#3 |
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Prostate Examiner
I quoff fine wine at corkd.com
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: good 'ole USA
Posts: 21,018
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this contest is by for and I don't need your May I have instead of ?
__________________
![]() why dogs sniff each other butts? |
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#4 |
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Banned
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Vancouver Canada
Posts: 15,115
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Looks like serge won LOL
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#5 | |
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Easy Like Sunday Morning
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Behind a couch, somewhere in Philly
Posts: 7,628
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Quote:
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#6 | |
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Prostate Examiner
I quoff fine wine at corkd.com
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: good 'ole USA
Posts: 21,018
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Quote:
__________________
![]() why dogs sniff each other butts? |
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#7 | |
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french with welsh tendancies
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 2,007
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Quote:
Oooh... you just ruled out half the board... and according to a recent survey, the mods here really need those prizes to eat... Here's an entry for you: "I hear Dravyk is canadian."
__________________
![]() LiveBucks / Privatefeeds - Giving you money since 1999 Up to 40% Commission! 25% Webmaster Referal |
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#8 | |
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Banned
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Vancouver Canada
Posts: 15,115
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Quote:
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#9 |
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GOLD DIGGER
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 1,421
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I still havent figured out how to post a smilie on the new board!
Where are they? Sabby
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#10 |
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Banned
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Vancouver Canada
Posts: 15,115
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Hit "post reply"
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#11 |
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GOLD DIGGER
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 1,421
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Yeah I did. Wheres the smilies?
Sabby
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#12 |
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Scored VIP to Anton's Piss Tank
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 8,781
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They should be just to the right of where you write your reply with a little link at the bottom of the box that says "more" that you can click on to bring up a seperate window that has em all. I am guessing since you don't appear to see that that you might have smileys turned off in your settings for your account.
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#13 |
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It's always business, never personal!
The POWER of radio Oprano Radio
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: On a golf course
Posts: 4,916
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Nice job Red and some sweet prizes ... It could even be about any webmaster that has crossed your path and left you with a bitter taste in your mouth ..
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#14 |
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GOLD DIGGER
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 1,421
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Okay some nice person turned them on for me.
Oh cool my boobies are here! (This smilie is even named after me on Netpond, LOL) Sabby
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#15 | |
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None
$100 for every ImLive sign-up
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 4,321
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Quote:
Writer that you are, the ability to say "Vengeance is MINE!" is completely within your grasp! The only prize you'll get is the ability to say "TAKE THAT!!" but that can sometimes be *more* than enough! DrGuile...one of my absolutely favorite movies is "Vertical Limit." I've seen it a dozen times at least. I hope I'm quoting this correctly, but if not, you'll get the gist. Skip Taylor: "She's French Canadian. Sometimes she's Canadian and can be quite pleasant. Today she's obviously French." That line reminds me so much of you. Not necessarily because of the "Candian/French" bit, but because you can't seem to decide whether you're a nice guy or not. That's always fascinated me. Sure, I won money in a contest sponsored by MacDaddy Bucks. I'm not an employee of MacDaddy Bucks. You really should work harder on getting over it. Old news. |
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#16 | |||
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Members
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 1,048
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Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
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#17 | |||
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Members
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 1,048
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Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
__________________
![]() Cartoon Caricatures and more... |
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#18 |
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My program is online. 90 days to MILLIONS!
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Vancouver Island
Posts: 1,278
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I have a full out story but it won't let me post it due to the following...:
You have included too many images in your signature or in your previous post. Please go back and correct the problem and then continue again. Images include use of smilies, the vB code [img] tag and HTML |
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#19 | |
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Cunty
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 10,150
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Quote:
__________________
Sucks to be you. |
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#20 |
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My program is online. 90 days to MILLIONS!
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Vancouver Island
Posts: 1,278
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One day
was feeling so had a to try make again. Part of the reason was feeling was because was single. really needed some but preferred to hang out at home andd ...largely because was very and and were friends with however, and the duo, when together, was pure and decided that to make again, that needed to stop , have a few , get ...and get a by having a that ended up To be sure that they got a at the very least, and made sure they invited a wide variety to the Friendly types, drop dead gorgeous types, and types, demanding types, and types, s and & and and types. The was but and because now was Luckily , , & , , , , , & , and were happy to and Had an ...They all had held a little for at some point or another, so they had an orgy was again, ...even . and were left and before they joined in. From that point on, was the of
Last edited by Trev; 09-21-2005 at 07:05 AM. |
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#21 |
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My program is online. 90 days to MILLIONS!
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Vancouver Island
Posts: 1,278
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lame I need to edit it apparently, the party smiley isn't working
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#22 |
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My program is online. 90 days to MILLIONS!
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Vancouver Island
Posts: 1,278
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Or if someone can please fix it so that the party* smiley doesn't conflict with the : p smiley...
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#23 | |
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Cunty
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 10,150
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Quote:
__________________
Sucks to be you. |
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#24 |
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My program is online. 90 days to MILLIONS!
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Vancouver Island
Posts: 1,278
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YAY thank you Trev!!!!
Last edited by Sin; 09-21-2005 at 07:13 AM. |
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#25 | |
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Cunty
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 10,150
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Quote:
__________________
Sucks to be you. |
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#26 |
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It's always business, never personal!
The POWER of radio Oprano Radio
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: On a golf course
Posts: 4,916
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Looking for a lobster smilie, a scat smilie and a tranny smilie now ...
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#27 | |
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Easy Like Sunday Morning
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Behind a couch, somewhere in Philly
Posts: 7,628
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Quote:
Btw, there are two emoticons named "butt", the human and the monkey, and so it defaults to the monkey all the time. Suggest making one of them "butt2".
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#28 |
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My program is online. 90 days to MILLIONS!
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Vancouver Island
Posts: 1,278
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I vote yes for that too Dravyk ...there are not supposed to be any monkeys in my story damnit!
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#29 | |
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Cunty
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 10,150
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Quote:
__________________
Sucks to be you. |
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#30 |
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Easy Like Sunday Morning
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Behind a couch, somewhere in Philly
Posts: 7,628
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Thanks, Trev!
Hmmm. You know, when you have the power to influence the changing of a 16 pixel graphic from a naked monkey shaking his butt to a naked guy shaking his butt, that your entire life hasn't been wasted. |
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#31 | |
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Cunty
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 10,150
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Quote:
__________________
Sucks to be you. |
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#32 | |
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Easy Like Sunday Morning
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Behind a couch, somewhere in Philly
Posts: 7,628
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Quote:
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#33 |
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On InterPol's Wanted List
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Lithuania
Posts: 121
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wow nice contest
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#34 |
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Dreaming of a Cowboy Hat like Max Hardcore
Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 1,812
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Since I've been away for most of the weekend, I've decided to extend this contest until Tuesday. This will give it one full week.
So I'm giving you all another shot. This board is full of intelligent and witty people, so lets see some of it. I've got lots of prizes to give away. |
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#35 |
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Punk Rock Porn Queen
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: California
Posts: 548
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Bear in mind that it's late and I've had waaaaay to much soda pop and not enough sleep.
My Entry: was feeling rather so he decided to to a club and on the dance floor. After a few he got up the nerve to ask to dance. Why she was knitting at a dance club, no one knows. So they all night and at the end of the evening invited him up for . Like a jackass he did the "I'm gonna score dance" so went home with instead. ended up home by himself to . He learned never to do the "I'm gonna score dance" again.
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#36 | |
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Banned
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Vancouver Canada
Posts: 15,115
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Quote:
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#37 | |
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Scored VIP to Anton's Piss Tank
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 8,781
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Quote:
Good one!! |
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#38 | |
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Easy Like Sunday Morning
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Behind a couch, somewhere in Philly
Posts: 7,628
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Quote:
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#39 |
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Punk Rock Porn Queen
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: California
Posts: 548
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*bow* Thank you, thank you. Insomnia + Smilies = Fun!
This contest kicked ass. How many times can we enter? |
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#40 | |
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Cunty
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 10,150
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Quote:
__________________
Sucks to be you. |
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#41 |
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Punk Rock Porn Queen
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: California
Posts: 548
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Awesome. And even if they can't be legal entries they're still fun to do.
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#42 |
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Dreaming of a Cowboy Hat like Max Hardcore
Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 1,812
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You may enter as many times as you wish.
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#43 | |
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None
$100 for every ImLive sign-up
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 4,321
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Quote:
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#44 |
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Punk Rock Porn Queen
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: California
Posts: 548
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Red: Yay!!
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#45 |
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Punk Rock Porn Queen
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: California
Posts: 548
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Another entry. Still no sleep so here goes...
Once upon a time there was a who kept his daughter locked in a tower. She was a bit of a so he hired , , , and to gaurd it. A nearby heard of the sluttly little princess so he hired some to capture her. The began to all the gaurds and rescue the princess. Once inside the found out that the had been replaced by who promply him for entering the tower. liked it so much he decided to stay in the tower and be for the rest of his days. The End.And even though it has no place in the story every entry should have in it because it makes me giggle.
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#46 |
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None
$100 for every ImLive sign-up
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 4,321
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lived alone except for his and . They kept company while he . The occasional to online friends was nice and broke up his day. Other than that, didn't do much. His best friend, , thought it was . decided that needed to get out and and . First, said " ." Then he tried to . But was a who wasn't going to let stay . and decided to into going out. and went out to . arranged for to meet . went . "Oops," thought. He called . met her and . some more, and finally called who owned a , and was a . ( thought she was but he was .) met and . and and . Then they . It was obvious they . was exhausted, so he went and had a from to reward himself.
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#47 |
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It's always business, never personal!
The POWER of radio Oprano Radio
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: On a golf course
Posts: 4,916
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Absolute class
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#48 |
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on prozac - be gentle
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Canada, eh!
Posts: 1,069
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Cast:
= Red = Morgan = Dravyk:devilguy1 = Nick = MikeAI = Sabby = Serge = Anthony = Vick******** :devilguy1 hired to join the Oprano Mod team. and were thrilled to have join the Oprano team; finally a gopher they could and amuse themselves with! to and noticed them . said, "Whatcha at?" and told that they were just thinking about having a with and how that would be because wouldn't know what to do with ! piped in and said, "Besides, doesn't have my long hair. There's no way he could possibly be as good as me in !" chimed in, "And he's a liberal for gawd sake! Lazy damn liberals wouldn't stand long enough for a !" added, "With the muscles has, he'll be lucky to have the energy to even all night long!" suggested that some wine and a would be more fun than having a with . just and her tits. was . He felt like he was just . and felt bad for and decided to make feel better. started a wig for . "That takes care of the hair problem." thought to herself. taught to and be a true republican. No more for . then got to start and build up that stamina.Finally, got a bottle of wine and she and and . Instead of a , and got and they ended up in together. They and all night long.Surprisingly, now had hair like , republican intellect like , strength like , and wit like . Unfortunately, also had like .The moral of the story is, you can imitate anyone, but, once a , always a .
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#49 |
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It's always business, never personal!
The POWER of radio Oprano Radio
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: On a golf course
Posts: 4,916
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AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA priceless ...
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#50 |
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Cunty
Want to see your own Advertising Here!
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 10,150
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gigi,
__________________
Sucks to be you. |
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