How shall I murder the person who sold me the stones tickets that never came?

[pushpills]

What do you think? Hopefully paypal will get back the g-note on these. I'm not too bummed since I have tickets for the one in january or whatever it is, and I don't feel so great tonight. Still, it's a beautiful night for an outdoor concert and this was the largest amount I ever spent on two tickets personally.

Also, first chicago stones concert i've missed since the age of 13.

I'm pissed, but, I could still have gone but its a freakin football field and I want really good seats, not spend 700 on a scalper to sit 80 some yards away from them...and i don't feel well enough to waste that kinda cash on shit seats.


I think i'll get a little online revenge. Guys personal details aren't going to be hard to get....ebay and paypal.

Anyway, assuming I decide to murder him, which I may, what method should I use?

[MorganGrayson]

Stoning, definitely. I do so appreciate both the irony and the elegance of the "theme." Besides, he's done worse than ripping you off for money. He's destroyed a tradition that has existed since before puberty.

That sort of crime deserves a slow, public death...with much jeering. (I like that word. "Jeering." Much classier than "name calling." "Taunting" isn't severe enough. It must be "jeering.")

[PornoDoggy]

I picked stoning, although a brick upside the head would be most appropriate for a Street Fightin' Man.

I've always thought that a painful death could be brought about with paper cuts. Lots and lots of paper cuts.

[Nickatilynx]

Get a spud peeler , and peel him.

[pushpills]

Originally Posted by PornoDoggy

I picked stoning, although a brick upside the head would be most appropriate for a Street Fightin' Man.

I've always thought that a painful death could be brought about with paper cuts. Lots and lots of paper cuts.

good suggestions!


I could also see the chainsaw, having a friend with a boombox blaring "monkey man" while I boot down the door and run in wielding a chainsaw and my big eyes open wide like a maniac. I'd need to get someone inside to film the entrance.

[PornoDoggy]

Actually ... Stones tickets is a serious matter.

You could resort to some things that aren't even fatal, but leave a certain impression.

Some associates of mine from long ago and far away once expressed their disappointment with another acquaintencewho was talking about some private matters to the wrong people with about 25 hits of LSD, two strobe lights, three black lights, and a large number of day-glow painted ping-pong and golf balls.

[XxXotic]

by flogging with a pickled herring!

[TheEnforcer]

Stoning....

[Newton]

steel pipe, superglue and razor wire .. perfect enema

[Vick]

How about extreme exposure until they scream

Gimme Shelter


Maybe duck taping them in a chair and throwing water on and attaching jumper cables to their testicles

While "Start me up" plays in the background

[pushpills]

Originally Posted by Vick

How about extreme exposure until they scream

Gimme Shelter


Maybe duck taping them in a chair and throwing water on and attaching jumper cables to their testicles

While "Start me up" plays in the background

good ones!

anyone else can feel free to add a song pairing with a method of murder/tourture too.

[XxXotic]

i've always been fond of bullwhips and devo

[Vick]

p.s. with regards to pushpills tag line

let the record show
I do shave my nutsack ........

..... it's better than waxing my nutsack

[Vick]

I kind of like PornoDoggy's idea with 19th nervous breakdown in the background

or send a video tape of you taking his girlfriend to a cheap sleazy motel with "Memory Motel" as the theme music

or tape his mother up with duct tape in the corner of a black room whilst beating him in front of his mother with "Paint it Black" and "Have You Seen Your Mother, Baby (Standing In The Shadows)" playing

I could probably go on for a while but I'll make it easy for the rest of you
http://www.keno.org/Songlistnlyrics.htm

[gigi]

stoning...definitely....sorry you missed it, but glad to hear you have tickets for the next concert!

[Dravyk]

Stoning.

But make sure it gathers no moss! Wouldn't want to soften the impact.

[MorganGrayson]

Originally Posted by Dravyk

Stoning.

But make sure it gathers no moss! Wouldn't want to soften the impact.

I'm actually so mortified to admit how many seconds it took *that* penny to drop that I'm admitting it publicly.