Born rich

[Vick]

MR. BROWN - "Like a Virgin" is all about a girl who digs a guy with a big dick. The whole song is a metaphor for big dicks.

MR. BLUE - No it's not. It's about a girl who is very vulnerable and she's been fucked over a few times. Then she meets some guy who's really sensitive--

MR. BROWN --Whoa...whoa...time out Greenbay. Tell that bullshit to the tourists.

JOE- (looking through his address book) Toby...who the fuck is Toby?
Toby...Toby...think...think... think...

MR. BROWN- It's not about a nice girl who meets a sensitive boy. Now granted that's what "True Blue" is about, no argument about that.

MR. ORANGE- Which one is "True Blue?"

NICE GUY EDDIE- You don't remember "True Blue?" That was a big ass hit for Madonna. Shit, I don't even follow this Tops In Pops shit, and I've at least heard of "True Blue."

MR. ORANGE - Look, asshole, I didn't say I ain't heard of it. All I asked was how does it go? Excuse me for not being the world's biggest Madonna fan.

MR. PINK - I hate Madonna.

MR. BLUE - I like her early stuff. You know, "Lucky Star," "Borderline" - but once she got into her "Papa Don't Preach" phase, I don't know, I tuned out.

MR. BROWN - Hey, fuck all that, I'm making a point here. You're gonna make me lose my train of thought.

JOE - Oh fuck, Toby's that little china girl.

MR. WHITE - What's that?

JOE - I found this old address book in a jacket I ain't worn in a coon's age. Toby what? What the fuck was her last name?

MR. BROWN - Where was I?

MR. ORANGE - You said "True Blue" was about a nice girl who finds a sensitive fella. But "Like a Virgin" was a metaphor for big dicks.

MR. BROWN - Let me tell ya what "Like a Virgin"'s about. It's about some cooze who's a regular fuck machine. I mean all the time, morning, day, night, afternoon, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick.

MR. BLUE - How many dicks was that?

MR. WHITE - A lot.

MR. BROWN - Then one day she meets a John Holmes motherfucker, and it's like, whoa baby. This mother fucker's like Charles Bronson in "The Great Escape." He's diggin tunnels. Now she's gettin this serious dick action, she's feelin something she ain't felt since forever. Pain.

JOE - Chew? Toby Chew? No.

MR. BROWN - It hurts. It hurts her. It shouldn't hurt. Her pussy should be Bubble-Yum by now. But when this cat fucks her, it hurts. It hurts like the first time. The pain is reminding a fuck machine what is was like to be a virgin. Hence, "Like a Virgin."

The fellas crack up.

JOE - Wong?

MR. BROWN - Fuck you, wrong. I'm right! What the fuck do you know about it anyway? You're still listening to Jerry-fucking-Vale.

JOE - Not wrong, dumb ass, Wong! You know, like the Chinese name?

Mr. White snatches the address book from Joe's hand. They fight, but they're not really mad at each other.

MR. WHITE - Give me this fucking thing.

JOE - What the fuck do you think you're doin? Give me my book back!

MR. WHITE - I'm sick of fuckin hearin it Joe, I'll give it back when we leave.

JOE - Whaddaya mean, give it to me when we leave, give it back now.

MR. WHITE - For the past fifteen minutes now, you've just been droning on with names. "Toby...Toby...Toby... Toby Wong...Toby Wong...Toby Chung...fuckin Charlie Chan." I got Madonna's big dick outta my right ear, and Toby Jap I-don't- know-what, outta my left.

JOE - What do you care?

MR. WHITE - When you're annoying as hell, I care a lot.