Cybernet Expo: Five Reaons to Attend

[gonzo]

So you took the limo drivers advice and you wont be wearing colored socks under your boots?

Ill be there!

Mitchell Brothers!!!!

Originally Posted by connor

Top Five Reasons to Attend Cybernet Expo

5) All seminars and workshops are geared specifically for the adult Internet business. That means you run the dangerous but exciting risk of learning things relevant to making more money in your business. We promise not to have any seminars or workshops on how to cling to DVD sales or faking orgasms for video, and we absolutely promise not to hand out awards to the sponsors who paid us the most money while you feign interest.

4) Relive your college days and leech free food and free drinks! Thanks to HotMovies.com, you’ll get to enjoy a free gourmet lunch while talking to representatives from the Free Speech Coalition about what you would like to see your trade organization tackle in the future. But you also won’t be left dry. You’ll find plenty of opportunities to toss down a few tasty beverages on our show sponsors because, let’s face it, alcohol just tastes better when someone else pays for it.

3) The show takes place in one of the coolest cities in America. You can’t get much better than San Francisco for an adult industry convention, a city that is known for great food, great sights, and even greater debauchery. It doesn’t matter your sexual preference, your kink, your fetish, whatever… San Francisco will still take your money with a smile, and the smile won’t be fake!

2) We actually give a shit about your ROI! We made sure that you won’t have to pay $400 a night for your rooms at Cybernet Expo, with rooms starting at $169 per night. We also kept our show badge prices lower than industry norms, with Earlybird prices at just $129. We know it’s a bit “unconventional,” but we thought why not make sure attendees actually get more value than the cost of attendance!

1) Increase your chance to get laid by up to 50% from a normal weekday. Why? Because Cybernet Expo attendees are going to experience some of the best parties of the year. D-Money is working on putting together a Player’s Ball that San Francisco won’t soon forget. Cybersocket has signed on to host the opening night party on June 10th, and Kink.com is treating Cybernet attendees to a soiree at the Armory Building that will be unlike anything this industry has seen before. These events, coupled with various late night hotel room gatherings and impromptu trips to local bars have been scientifically shown to increase your chance to get laid by up to 50% for men, and up to 250% for hot women.

[Disclaimer: We made up the statistics in 1, but we did have a dream where Jesus descended from the clouds and said many people would in fact get laid at Cybernet Expo this year. We can neither confirm not deny the Messiah’s comments.]