[PornoDoggy]

For many years, my cologne was Jack Daniels.

I have not used Old Spice since the Johnson Administration (Lyndon, muthafuckas!).

As far as I know, I have two bottles of cologne. One is some American Crew that was given to me because I like their shampoo (Drav/Sar - as you may recall, that's soap for your hair). I have had it three or four years, and probably used it twice a year.

The other is some Stetson, a gift for my 40th birthday from my midlife-crisis-girlfriend (a gymnast six months older than my oldest daughter). That I've had for over twelve years now, and probably haven't opened it in over eleven.