WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

I thought it was to show the possum that it COULD BE DONE!
Here are some other opinions:


GEORGE W. BUSH
I don't think I should have to answer that question.


AL GORE
I invented the chicken. I invented the road. Therefore, the chicken
crossing the road represented the application of these two different
functions of government in a new, reinvented way designed to bring
greater services to the American people.


RALPH NADER
The chicken's habitat on the original side of the road had been
polluted by unchecked industrialist greed. The chicken did not reach
the unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road because it was
crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.


PAT BUCHANAN
To steal a job from a decent, hard-working American.


RUSH LIMBAUGH
I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it was
getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet someone
out there is already forming a support group to help chickens with
crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much more of
this can real Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid for by
their tax dollars, and when I say tax dollars, I'm talking about
your money, money the government took from you to build roads for
chickens to cross.


MARTHA STEWART
No one called to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a
standing order at the farmer's market to sell my eggs when the price
dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.


JERRY FALWELL
Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't you people
see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to
the "other side." That's what they call it - the other side. Yes, my
friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will
become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this
abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless
phrases like "the other side."


DR. SEUSS
Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes! The chicken crossed the road,
But why it crossed, I've not been told!


ERNEST HEMINGWAY
To die. In the rain. Alone.


MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads
without having their motives called into question.


GRANDPA
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone
told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough
for us.


BARBARA WALTERS
Isn't that interesting? In a few moments we will be listening to
the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart-warming story of how
it a serious case of molting and went on to accomplish its life-long
dream of crossing the road.


JOHN LENNON
Imagine all the chickens crossing roads in peace.


ARISTOTLE
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.


KARL MARX
It was a historical inevitability.


SADDAM HUSSEIN
This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified
in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.


VOLTAIRE
I may not agree with what the chicken did, but I will defend to the
death its right to do it.


RONALD REAGAN
What chicken?


CAPTAIN KIRK
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.


FOX MULDER
You saw it cross the road with your own eyes! How many more chickens
have to cross before you believe it?


SIGMUND FREUD
The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the
road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.


BILL GATES
I have just released eChicken 2003, which will not only cross
roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance
your checkbook - and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of
eChicken.


ALBERT EINSTEIN
Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the
chicken?


BILL CLINTON
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by
chicken? Could you define chicken please?


THE BIBLE
And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken,
Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and
there was much rejoicing.


COLONEL SANDERS
I missed one!

VICK
Because I had my penis out and was chasing it with a bottle of Sonny's BarBQue/Hot Wing sauce

Vick, what have your penis do with poor chicken????????

DV, good one
;-)

Dianna: Hahahahahaha!! :>)))

Some more:

Nietzsche : Because if you gaze too long across the Road, the Road gazes also across you.

Jerry Seinfeld : Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why doesn't anyone ever think to ask, 'What the heck was this chicken doing walking all over the place anyway?

Gilligan : The traffic started getting rough; the chicken had to cross. If not for the plumage of its peerless tail - the chicken would be lost. The chicken would be lost!

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Cause me and Anthony wanted to speak to him :)


ahahahahaha

haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahahhahah ahahahah
;-)))))

Nick,
PEOPLE KNOW......
;-))

http://www.gofuckyourself.com/showthread.p...50&pagenumber=1

Nick,
we ain't no chickens,
but LL and me wanna cross the BORDER to speak with you...
;-))

bring the filming crew,
I'll bring the wine
;-)))

Why did Brad cross the road?

To get away from the chicken :)



Why did Serge cross the road?
To get his dick outta the chicken :)

Nick, you mixed it all up...it was Vick's dick, not mine!
;-))

but I understand your confusion, all dicks look the same to you, you are not exactly
Dick Connoseur!
;-)))

LL, NO, they are NOT look all the same!

Ask Cleo!
;-)))

When you do ,and make it soon,don't book a hotel.

Stay here at Chez Nick. :)

on the dick matter I bow to your greater knowledge and experience :)



Last edited by Nickatilynx at Dec 21 2002, 02:12 PM

Was Hungry and Horny so I thought to eat it and fuck it ....

Ooops sorry, I'm confused, wrong animal to eat and fuck

I have a real life chicken and road story...

A couple of years ago I was out driving with a friend and my then 6 yr old, Jordan, when we spotted a chicken...crossing the road.

My friend slammed on the brakes and he and Jordie immediately wound down their windows and started screaming 'WHY, WHY CHICKEN, WHY DID YOU CROSS THE ROAD?!?!?'

I laughed so hard I cried, all the time thinking, 'I'm just driving along, minding my own business and the next thing I know I'm in the middle of a joke'.

:bjump: :bjump: :bjump:

:biglaugh: :yowsa: :yowsa: :biglaugh: :biglaugh: :bdance: :cdance:

lol- I like your's too.

I missed all these. Long ass crazy weekend.

I'm dating two women, nothing serious and now they both want to get serious and become exclusive. I couldn't choose even if I had too.

I need advice from the guys. What would you do?

This is making me tired too.

:awinky:

Dear Dianna: Hey girlfriend, good to see you back.

I'm no guy, but it seems the fact you "couldn't choose if you had to" between the two ladies in your life right now probably indicates serious and exclusive to either one isn't right for you, at this time anyway.

In my experience, an inner sense of "knowing" happens at some point, and then serious and exclusive makes sense. Until then....you're not ready.

You just got single again, so perhaps you need more time to just date and have fun. No shame in that. :rolleyes:

Guys??

lol- I like your's too.

I missed all these. Long ass crazy weekend.

I'm dating two women, nothing serious and now they both want to get serious and become exclusive. I couldn't choose even if I had too.

I need advice from the guys. What would you do?

This is making me tired too.

:awinky:[/b][/quote]
DV,
if I were you,
I'd play with MYSELF...

do me and forget about those 2!
;-)))

Lol- Funny Serge....thanks LL.

I agree and would like to see them both. I think it's different with women. I don't know why I can't date them both without them wanting to pull me in hook, line and sinker.

It's never this complicated with men.

Hey what's up for the holidays??

Oh, my dear, you've obviously been out of the heterosexual market WAY too long! :headwall: Either that or you're trying to tell lies so Santa doesn't stop at your house :awinky:

Dear Peaches:

Bahahahahahahaha!! And Santa knows..... <_<

ST. ELMO'S FIRE (1985)
Ally Sheedy: "Men... Can't live with 'em, can't shoot 'em."

oh puhlease!!!

men are fucking shits!!!

peaches, i agree, no santa visit for dianna ;-)))

you could either introduce them to each other ......

or explain that you need two women, that way when there's conversation you don't have to be involved - that's the man's method of handling the situation

Oh, my dear, you've obviously been out of the heterosexual market WAY too long! :headwall: Either that or you're trying to tell lies so Santa doesn't stop at your house :awinky:[/b][/quote]
LOL- Oh really peaches?

I work around men all the time. I've had several great relationships with men and have even been married twice. I don't think all men are shits....just most. Some of my close friends are men. I enjoy intelligent, deep, spiritual types. Now that I'm older fewer men interest in sexually.

Hell right now, I'm more interested in business and when I'm not working having a good time. I will admit that I do enjoy having a lover/partner who stimulates my imagination. These days I have such little time.

I am certain that being in the porn industry has pushed me more towards women. When I see the shit I see every day it doesn't put men in a positive light. I know you all know what I mean. I'm not stereotyping just aware of the facts...

A man will spend hundreds of dollars on phone sex when he can't afford it. Almost uncontrollably he’ll whip out his card and purchase things he can’t afford because he’s horny. Oh shit I can go on and on.

I believe there are real men out there and I can spot them right away. If I was going to be with a man I’d need to trust and respect him.

I’ve pretty much broke the news to the ladies and we’ll see what they do with it. Like I said… I’m busy and the reality is that I depend on no one for my happiness. I’m getting ready to build my dream (34 acres- Panthers Crossing) and it’s really exciting. I’m opening live cams with bdsm/fetish. Although I keep an arm’s distant from staff and talent, it’s still eye candy I’m going to enjoy. Being a director let’s you paint you’re won picture and that’s a beautiful thing! <evil grin> :okthumb:

Oh, no, now I didn't say ALL men are shits :awinky: I have tons of male friends and most of them are a lot more honest and trustworthy than some females I've run into (except Shok, but he's so feminine, he's not really "male"), but even they still can be royal pains at times :okthumb:

And I can be a bitch, so I suppose it all equals out :)

I've been lucky - as I was going through my Christmas cards, I realize I still have contact with almost all my "romantic" relationships - even my HS sweetheart. Heck, his wife writes me longer notes than he does, lol! There are a few I wouldn't help out of a ditch, but that's because they've done things that very few people would forgive and forget.

In all fairness, since I've never been sexually attracted to females (or feminine men, as Shok can verify), I'm damn glad men are around :bjump:

Added: You mention the industry and it HAS changed my opinion on guys - now I'm always wondering what freaky kink lies underneath the nicely dressed man in the suit! :zoinks:



Last edited by Peaches at Dec 24 2002, 12:07 PM

Ain't that the truth?

Kinda like Forrest Gump- "Life's like a box of chocolates... you never know what you're gonna get."

"Men are like neatly wrapped packages, some with bows, some with scent, some expensive and some brown paper bags....You NEVER know what's inside based on the package."